#LivingintheGap

The last several months have been a real struggle for my little family, more so than most. Money has been very tight.Things were so tight,I found myself having to work weekends and adding additional hours to my 12 hrs days just to keep our heads above water.  Add injury and illness to that already stressful situation and you have the perfect storm for a struggling, low-income family. It's an awful place to be.

So, I sat down at my computer and wrote about my pain, fears, and frustration.

That story was featured at  http://www.betteridaho.org/2015/11/in-her-own-words/ and http://www.spokesman.com/blogs/hbo/2015/nov/12/idaho-poverty-slow-death-sentence/.

The story was viewed more than 20,000 times!  

While I am proud to speak out against issue of poverty, it is still hard. I've received some hate email and some wickedly mean comments online. A few people have even demanded that I leave my Idaho home, calling me a traitor to my state. 

To those people I have this to say. "Idaho is my home and I love it. I am deeply rooted to this soil. My daughter is a fifth generation Idahoan and my husband's family have been ranching in Idaho even longer. And over the last forty years I've watched those hard working Idahoans go from hopeful to hopeless. Idaho is a beautiful place to live but a tough place to survive. Running from a fight never changes things. I am staying right here and I will continue to fight to make Idaho a better place for us all."

It has been a strange journey to say the least. But, I believe in this cause. Every American deserves access to health care. This sentiment has been echoed by most of the people who have responded to my story--90% of respondents are horrified by my situation. Apparently even the President agrees with me, because he viewed my story and responded by email! You can find a copy of his letter below.

And yet, Idaho still sees fit to keep punishing its working poor--waitstaff, laborers,caregivers, store clerks--by refusing to adopt into Medicaid a benefit that is now offered to every other American through A.C.A. Nearly everyone I know and love is in the gap. These are hard working people who just happen to be poor.

And Idaho is building the state on our broken and neglected bodies. 

A Slow Death Sentence

I woke this morning with half my face swollen and throbbing--another bad tooth.

I sat in the bathroom with an icepack pressed to my face and bawled. Not because of the pain but because of sheer frustration.  I knew the tooth was going. I’d even managed to set aside $150 for the dentist over the last six months but it was far from the $650 the dentist needs for the root canal and crown. 

Once again, I’d lose a body part to poverty.

It had only been a month since I’d lost the use of my little toe, on my right foot.  I’d stubbed the hell out of it on my piano bench and though that toe had been broken before the pain was so intense I’d thought it best to get it x-rayed. The x-ray showed a mess of splintered, fragmented bones and the tendons torn away from their anchor points.

The doctor referred me to an orthopedic surgeon who reviewed my x-rays and said, “It’s a real mess in there. I’d like to schedule you for surgery.”

He continued on telling me how the bones pieces would need to be removed from my toe and a rod would be their replacement.  He warned me that taking no action would result in the toes becoming increasingly painful and arthritic.

“Can I schedule you for next week?” he asked earnestly.

“Ummm…doctor how much will this cost?”

“Not much, about five thousand dollars. I have openings in the surgical schedule for next Thursday….” He sat there looking at me waiting for my consent. The paper cover I sat on crinkled loudly in the silence.

I dropped my head and said, “I cannot afford that. That is more than I paid for my truck and I’m uninsured.”

“Oh,” replied. “In that case I wouldn’t worry about it too much. The circulation is good. It will never work again but there is no danger of infection.” 

He shook my hand and left the room.

I hobbled back out to my truck and cried for an hour. The loss of a toe, in the grand scheme of things, isn’t that awful. I could still walk and hike for now.…but someday soon it was going to start hurting and it would never stop; constant and continuous pain.

I’d had enough pain already to last me a lifetime.

Over the years, I’ve lost about ten teeth, a finger, and a few toes to poverty.  I try to rationalize—it’s not that bad, it is just one tiny body part.

But--it is that bad. These are only the injuries that people can see.

A lifetime of stress induced by poverty has stooped my back, given me a nervous stomach that makes me throw up when my stress is too high and induces days of stomach churning diarrhea, and causes migraines so bad that sometimes I am confined to a bed for a whole day, often much longer. I lost my uterus in the same manner I lost my toe—years of battling scar tissue and severe pain resulted in a doctor telling me it would be far cheaper in the long run to remove these “parts.”

What choice does a person with no resources have? 

These are the injuries others don’t see.  They don’t see the hopelessness I feel. They don’t see the what-if fear that resides constantly in my heart. They don’t’ see my despair. They don’t see my self-worth plummeting with the loss of each little part. These are the injuries that stack up and make it even harder for me to escape poverty.

Someday, I’ll have no more body parts left to lose.

Living in poverty is a slow death sentence.

I wash the tears from my face with cold water, brush my hair, and paste a half-assed smile on my swollen face. It's time for work.

What choice do I have?

President Obama Responds!

Dear Michelle: Thank you for writing.  The Affordable Care Act gives people greater control over their health care, and thanks to the law, millions of people have new ways to buy health insurance at a price they can afford.  However, some governors and state legislators have resisted extending affordable coverage to Americans who need it by turning down the option to expand Medicaid—even though the Federal Government would pay for virtually all of the costs.  I know many hardworking families are hurting as a result. Thankfully, many benefits of the Affordable Care Act are available to all Americans, regardless of whether or not their state has expanded Medicaid.  Those who have previously been denied coverage due to a pre-existing condition now have access to coverage.  The law still helps millions of young people stay on their parents’ plans until age 26, and it still provides people with coverage access to free preventive care like cancer screenings that catch illnesses early on. I will keep working with states that haven’t expanded Medicaid to make sure they do the right thing.  But in the meantime, if you need insurance, I encourage you to see if you can apply for coverage by visiting www.HealthCare.gov, calling 1‑800‑318‑2596, or contacting your state Medicaid office, since you may qualify for existing health care options. You should also know the requirement to purchase coverage only applies to those who can afford it.  Specifically, you may be exempt from this requirement if you lack coverage because your state has not expanded Medicaid.  You can learn more about this and other exemptions at www.HealthCare.gov/Exemptions. Thank you, again, for writing—your message will be on my mind in the days ahead. Sincerely, Barack Obama